Molly is sassy lately. Really, really sassy. She has been from the second she arrived on this earth, but just plain mean the past few weeks. She is livid if she doesn't get her way. She makes "I hate you SO much" faces. She yells at me. She bobs her little smart aleck head back and forth while she tells me she won't do what I'm asking. Twice in the last week, I have called her over to me to tell her she needs to stop what she's doing, and she just won't come. At home that's typical, but in public, she's generally a pretty good girl. I have to chase her, which makes me look like a freaking idiot, then grab her, then hold her face still with my hand so she will look at me. The whole time she is squirming, pulling away, and hollering like I am breaking her in half.The truth is...I want to break her in half. Sometimes. I mostly want to stay calm and in control. But in these situations, SHE is calling the shots. A lot of times, she is yelling at me in the car. My blood starts to boil and I yell back. I am then smack dab in the middle of a screaming match with my 5 year old. I can see the type of teenager she is going to be if we keep this up, and I don't like it. I don't want to feel like all is lost, like I can't reason with her. She is a very tender but passionate child. My well of "Molly patience" has run completely dry.
12 comments:
I am no expert, but what would happen if you didn't respond? If you just said to her, you will do this, and not gratify her protestations with an answer? Not sure it would help, but I wanted to put it out there... good luck, you are an amazing mother!
This happened with Alexa and I last night... We had it out. Grrrr... No good advice but if you get some, lets talk.
Joshua is like that with Ken, but not with me. I wonder if I did something to facilitate that. He's the worst at the dinner table when Ken tells him to stop something and he does a smirky smile and does it again.
Josh is scared of my consequences like sitting on the stairs by himself so he usually does what I say.
I did use the scriptures the other day and surprisingly he got it. I asked if he loved Heavenly Father and wanted to do what He said. Josh said yes. So then I asked him if he loved me and he again said yes. Then I told him if he loved me then he would do what I asked him to do. Cheesy, but it worked for a while.
You're totally right, April. I shouldn't underestimate her. When I get nice and mellow and cooled off, I'll discuss it with her. :)
With Dave, getting angry or upset did nothing but if I put my arm around him and talked sweetly, he would do anything for me. Maybe she is like her Dad?
Goodness - you pretty much just described what I was like when I was four and five. I'll ask my mom what she did because honestly, I was a pill.
I have no advice. Each of my kids reacts so differently to different things. I haven't figured out Ethan yet; he's to me like Molly is to you, I think. Something will work one day but not the next. We've started to say a prayer together in the morning when we can remember. I'm hoping that will help in the long run. I don't know how much it helps in the short term, but I know it can't hurt. :) Lots and lots and lots of never-ending prayer...and lots of discussions about what he needs to change AND what I need to change...so he knows that I want to be better, too. Maybe we could share a therapist? :)
Pray, pray and pray some more. One thing I do know is she is yours and Dave's because you can learn the most from her and vice versa.
I wish I had advice--specific advice--advice that would fix it yesterday for you. And I don't. I drop the ball all the time and feel so helpless some of the time and feel like that same freaking idiot you described a lot of the time too. I love you though Amy. So much. And that beautiful five year old of yours too. Good luck--from one mother to another. :-) (I'll pray for you too)
Sounds just like what I have been going through with my 6 year old. Must be the red hair. ;)
Amy, I always love your honesty, it makes me feel so much better, and plus when it's happening to other people and not me at the time, it makes for a good laugh :) hang in there, I know you are a GREAT mom!!
wish I had some great advice....let all of us know when you figure it out.
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