pretty darn tired...

HA! You know I'm feeling a little down if I'm willing to share this 1980-something field hockey beauty with you. This is how I feel right now. Worn out. Really, really tired. I went on an 8 mile run this morning in week 3 of my marathon training. I didn't fuel very well beforehand. I usually have a goo of some sort which seems to give me just enough energy to get the job done. Anyhow, could be that. Could be the fact that we are running pretty fast, pushing pretty hard, all the time. We consistently average 8:30 miles. Not fast for you, maybe, but fast for me. :) Could be that I've been running - a lot - for awhile now. Whatever it is, I don't like it. I wasn't dreading my run this morning, but I also don't want it to get to that point. Maybe the rigorous marathon training isn't for me. We'll see. Hopefully it's just a funk...and in a few days I'll be loving it again.

Here's what I AM loving though:

*My dear friend is back from what seems like MONTHS of trips. :)

*All things Margaret. She is cute, cute, cute right now. Her teeth, her cheesy smile, her raggedy hair, the way she lisps "Jesus" and tries to hug his picture on our wall.

*Molly singing "Oh Where Is My Hairbrush" from Veggitales in my ear.

*Anticipation of the fabulous/trashy Bachelor tonight.

*Planning for Girls Camp. Serious GREAT stuff.

great teeth...

A trip to the dentist yesterday for the 4 older kids.

No cavities!

That doesn't happen very often.

I'm not even going to talk about how much orthodontic care we need.

Margaret REALLY likes to brush her teeth.

apologies...

I'm telling you...Molly is the queen of notes, and pictures and tiny little packages wrapped up in notes and pictures. Makes me crazy. It really does. She writes a note on computer paper, then uses 3 more pieces and 1/2 my tape to wrap it up. She puts things on our beds, in my purse, on the walls. She really is sweet. I think she partly does it to make people happy, and partly to get something in return. For every 40-45 gifts, she gets something back. Isn't that sad? That is how she shows people she loves them, so it's also how she determines if people love HER. Sometimes I'll take an old handout from YW, or a piece of gum and leave it on her pillow. It makes her happy.

*She really likes to draw babies. Swaddled babies.

unloading...

So, I had a crap day. I just couldn't get a grip. I was overwhelmed, frustrated with my baby, short with everybody. Days like this come along every once in awhile. I know tomorrow will be better. I'm banking on it. I started to soften around dinner time (which was 7 pm by the way...WAY too late). I had a very distinct feeling that I was not giving my children enough of ME. Happy me. Not flustered, tired, worn out me. I decided that I needed individual time with each child, every day. I'm not sure how it will pan out, this great idea of mine, but I know that it needed to happen tonight. It needed to happen for one of my sweet little people. One of them had been carrying around a burden for awhile. Something they had done wrong a year ago. Something that was worrying them. When I lay down next to them, I asked if they wanted to talk about their valentines, and this little angel started crying and telling me they wanted to talk about something different. Then they put it all out there. We hugged, talked about repentance and how wonderful it feels to get something like that off your chest. We talked about what to do to fix it. Then this little someone said a prayer. They prayed for good dreams and that they would not cry any more about sinning. Oh my goodness, I was a mess. I love moments like this. THIS is why I am a mom. I love them so much. I love to lead and guide them. I love to teach them gospel truths. What a rewarding night at the end of a terribly rotten day.

stop me!

If you ever happen to run into me at the grocery store, and I'm checking out, and I have giant lolipops in my basket...remind me that THIS is why I hate them. These are from Christmas! Can you see the wads of gum that Molly saves? Seriously?!

sibart & some smudges...

This is Alex's latest drawing. I put it on the sidebar, but thought it deserved a tiny bit more attention. I was next to him in sacrament meeting last Sunday when the first eye came to be. He drew it, didn't trace it, with no picture in front of him. I think the picture is very similar to one he saw in Leven Thumps. He creates things like this. From memory. It is amazing to me. HE is amazing. He sees things differently than most of the world. He sees textures, shadows and light. He sees tiny, tiny details. I watch his hand move across the paper, wondering what I am about to see. His pictures sometimes look almost like photographs to me. What a gift. He writes stories too. He is so brilliant with his words. You can hear, see, smell, feel what he is describing. He loves to read, so bases his stories on others that he's enjoyed. I'm sure he could write #8 to the Harry Potter series...and we'd all love it!

our day to day...

1. Alex got some sort of award at scouts the other night. I don't really remember what it was for. I DO know that he turns 12 in 6 weeks. 6 weeks, people! My son is going to be 12, receiving the priesthood and all that entails. I love him so much. He is funny, and talented, and good. I hope he will be a great addition to the YM program. He'll be going with me on Tuesday nights. SO wierd.

2. Molly is a letter writer. She is amazing. I'll bet most of you reading this have gotten one. She really is bright. She sounds things out, rarely asking for help, and gets pretty darn close. Close enough that WE can sound it out. :) She makes things for people ALL the time. I've got a treasure on my pillow as we speak.

3. Lizzy and Emily are dream girls. They come home from school and go straight to the kitchen table to do their homework. I never have to ask. They cry if they leave an assignment at school. They are pleasers. They do whatever I ask. I've noticed that I don't always do what THEY ask, though. Not that I need to, but when they ask for a piece of gum...and I say no, for no good reason, I rethink things. Margaret wouldn't give me ANY space yesterday. She was on me, hurting me all day long. Lizzy saw how frustrated I was and took her away. She played with her and distracted her. I was so grateful.

4. Margaret is still thinking about talking. She says a lot of "yeah" and "no" and "uh-oh". She'll say please (actually "peas") with the cutest little lisp you've ever seen. She wants to do stuff by herself. Her buckles, her shoes, wipe her dirty bum. I'm not a fan. Still funny as can be. She really is. And good grief...she is cute! Her hair is getting longer. She's getting tall. Can't wait to see what she turns in to.

5. Dave is awesome. Works so hard, every day. He loves his kids and me so much (so much, he'll watch the Bachelor with me). What a great dad. Great cook. Great support. He supports my running at crazy hours, and listens to all my worries and concers about my development as a runner. I love him for it.

6. I am plugging along. I love my family and friends. I love my calling. I love to run. My bursitis is back in my left knee, which worries me...A LOT. I'll stay off it for a bit and hope and pray that it gets better so I can start training for my May marathon.

Schofield life is pretty darn awesome!