sunday dinner...

Sometimes...

this is what we do

at the dinner table

on Sundays.

Not very reverent,

but totally hilarious.

one last recording...

Yesterday was a little bitter-sweet for us. The kids recorded their last episode for the Mormon Channel radio station. We have been driving to Salt Lake fairly regularly for the past few months. It has been such a treat. Brant (producer) and Amen (master mixer), who run the show are really, really great guys. They have been so good to my kids. Excited to see them, complimentary, gentle, and kind. Yesterday Molly saw Amen walking behind us, decided to leave me, and grabbed his hand to walk the rest of the way with him. I really like them. REALLY. I know that Alex thinks they are pretty much the cat's meow. Hopefully he was able to take notes of all the traits they have that make them that cool.

We love Mrs. Anderson. Sister Anderson. Tami. Whatever. She is fabulous in every way. Especially her shoes. The woman has some seriously great shoes. She loves my kids and you can tell. They love her just as much. When someone is kind and loving with your kids, you love them back. It's just how it works for us parents.

Yesterday, before recording, we went on one last tour. This time, Brant and Amen took us down through the tunnels under temple square. Guess who we saw. Yup. We sure did. The prophet, his counselors, and the apostles. They were all heading back to work after their Thursday meeting in the temple. We were up ahead of them a bit when they came through the tunnel in their security driven golf carts. My chest could have very easily exploded...on the spot. I saw our dear, sweet President Monson, Elder Eyring, Elder Uchtdorf, Elders Packer, Scott, Ballard, Hale, Perry. Could have been more. My eyes were too blurry to tell for sure. I did grab a few pictures. They aren't great. I don't think it'd be a great idea for me to post them anyway. Just take my word for it...a few of the coolest moments of my life. Without question, the same can be said for my kids. They saw the prophet. The true and living prophet.

purging...

I came across this beautiful quote the other day on my cute friend Kylie's blog. It has spent a lot of time playing over in my mind:

"Some mothers seem to have the capacity and energy to make their children's clothes, bake, give piano lessons, go to Relief Society, teach Sunday School, attend parent-teacher association meetings and so on. Other mothers look upon such women as models and feel inadequate, depressed, and think they are failures when they make comparisons...Sisters, do not allow yourselves to be made to feel inadequate or frustrated because you cannot do everything others seem to be accomplishing. Rather, each should assess her own situation, her own energy, and her own talents, and then choose the best way to mold her family into a team, a unit that works together and supports eachother. Only you and your Father in Heaven know your needs, strengths, and desires. Around this knowledge your personal course must be charted and your choices made."
*Marvin J. Ashton*

So last night, I deleted close to 100 websites from my favorites list. Blogs I checked every once in awhile. Photographers I admired. Cooking sites. Here's the thing. My food never tasted as good as theirs looked. My kids were never dressed quite as cute as so and so's, nor were their bedrooms as fabulous. My photography couldn't even compare to some of what I was checking out. I was comparing. Every single day. My mothering abilities, my home decor, my kids haircuts, my pictures. I was bombarding myself with things that were of little or no importance. And they were all making me feel crummy.

The wonderful thing is, we are all so unique. We have very personal gifts and abilities given to us by an all-knowing Heavenly Father. Qualities that make us capable of amazing things...things that only WE can do. I felt so refreshed every time I clicked delete last night. The computer would ask me if I was sure I wanted to erase it from my hard drive. Yup...I'm sure.

1/2...

On Saturday, I ran the Provo River 1/2 marathon! I ran it. The whole thing. It took me 1:56:57. Three seconds faster than my watch said. You better believe those 3 seconds matter, too. I like the sound of 1:56 better than 1:57. :) That comes out to 8 minute 55 second miles...13 of them. I am going to write my feelings about the whole experience. Skip it if you want. I need to write it for those days in the future when I may doubt myself a bit. When I may wonder if running is really for me.

Melissa and I started running together around March. I had been working out at the gym since January. Cross-training, I guess you would call it. We weren't fast, but we were determined. I remember doing the 5 mile loop in just under an hour and feeling like I could conquer the world! I also remember her telling me she wanted to sign up for a half marathon. CRAZY. She told me to join her...and I told her NO WAY. In May though, I started to feel a lot stronger. I was running 4-6 miles a day, 6 days a week. I signed up for the darn thing. I was excited, but so, so nervous. I knew I could complete it, but I knew it would be slow. I kindof didn't care though. It was all about completion for us.

Can you see me? Right there in the middle of the frame. :)

When I came back from DE at the end of June, things changed a little. Melissa was in a lot of pain and was being told by doctors not to run for awhile. She was devastated and so was I. How could I do this? Should I just give up? Enter Tara. Tara decided she would run with us, or just me if Melissa wasn't able. For the next 5-6 weeks, we trained together. She worked me HARD. The loop a few times a week, hills, speed work, and weekly long runs. Tara is faster than me. She has a lot more experience (4 marathons). She has made me faster. By pushing me just past where I thought I could go. Every day at the end of our runs, I would look at my stop watch and say, "Holy crap, Tara" and show her the time. She would high-5 me, then bring me a Diet Coke. :) I was getting faster and stronger. Runs weren't hurting as much. It was a little rush...every morning. She had/has complete confidence in me. She loves me and wants to make me better.

Anyhow...a few weeks back, Melissa let me know that there was no way she would be able to run. She was in too much pain. I was terrified. Really, really stressed. I had trained with Tara, but could I run it by myself? Tara knew my concerns, so she registered. She registered and ran the whole thing right beside me. Not at her pace, but at mine. She could have finished a good 10 minutes faster, but she didn't. She stuck with me. I cry when I think about what she did. She did it for me. The race had nothing to do with her. I really, really love her for it.

These pictures are rough...but I just don't care. I am sweaty, my face is grimaced, my form looks awful...and I don't care. It felt great.

At mile 11.5, I started to wind down. I was losing energy fast. Tara saved her very best story of the day for those last few minutes. :) I remember turning to her at one point and saying, "Tara...tell me I can do this." She did just that. She had faith in me. I was elated as we got a few hundred yards from the finish and I saw Dave and the kids. I was able to really push it from there. After I crossed the finish, I had to supress my sobs. I couldn't believe what I had accomplished. I am so grateful to Melissa for helping to light this fire in me, and so grateful to Tara for keeping it fueled.

And guess what...Melissa RAN IT! She was in pain, and she ran it. She is tough as nails. She really is. I love these girls. SO much.

she walks...

It's funny to me how some kids take their sweet time reaching milestones. Actually, funny isn't the right word. Stressful is more like it, though you try to pretend it doesn't really matter. BUT, when your 14 month old beauty has no teeth and is showing no signs of walking OR talking...you wonder. Well, she picked it up. The walking part. We're still waiting on the teeth and speech, but for now we'll take walking. Once she started, she didn't stop. I thought she would mix it up a little...walk, crawl, walk, crawl. Nope. Not Margaret. She'll be running by next week! YAY, baby girl!

napless...

This sweet girl has not had a nap since May. I'll chalk most of it up to being a lazy mom...or just too tired to worry about it. It's been a long summer in our miserably hot "swamp cooled" damp house, with a seriously cranky 4 year old. I love her to pieces. I really, really do, but she fights. A LOT. The older 3 don't tolerate it anymore, and they fight back. There is a ton of screaming, biting, pinching, slapping, hair pulling...all from Molly. She wakes the baby from her naps. She somehow makes our house seem even hotter. :( I think she is struggling with the "new baby" thing...a year late. She was spoiled, for 3 1/2 years. She got what she wanted. The kids doted on her. She was IT around here. She isn't anymore...or at least she has to share the IT position. It's not sitting well with her. That, and she's exhausted. She never naps. Until yesterday. She was in my room on my bed, being punished for the 3rd time. She dozed off, with a ring pop ring as her pacie. We're trying again today. :)

52.

My dear, sweet parents are celebrating 52 years together. Can you believe that? 52 years! And they are happy. I love them more than I can even tell you.