minnie...

I bet you've never seen a sassier Minnie Mouse. Today was Mickey/Minnie Mouse day in kindergarten. Mrs. Thibault may love Disney even more than Michelle. :) Molly was super excited to wear her Minnie shirt, but after a 20 minute search, we came up empty handed. SO, we decided to turn her into Minnie with Lizzy's ears. She was VERY happy, and VERY into this little impromptu photoshoot. She let me take almost 70 pictures. Yay for digital!

Some very random thoughts today:

My kids love to point out yellow cars while we are driving. I think they learned it from the Young's. Anyhow, they say, "YELLOW ONE" and get a point or feel cool or something like that. Emily is the funniest. She will be mid sentence, yellow one, then continue on. It's seamless. She caught another fly for me today. Within 2 minutes. It's a daily occurance now. Anyhow, the "yellow one" business drives me nuts sometimes, yet yesterday as I was out running errands...alone...I found myself saying it everytime I saw one. I guess I secretly love it.

Margaret is beyond delicious today. Or at least she WAS. She may wake up from her nap a different creature. She wanted her hair curled. Her outfit was fabulous. She kept talking and lisping. I wish I could have video taped the whole morning.

*Note to Amy - check your teeth after you eat roasted broccoli then head out for parent teacher conferences. I really hoped to get to know Alex's teachers better. Talk to them so they would see that I was interested. Make a good 2nd impression. I get to the car and find broccoli. I wanted to die. I told him to apologize to all of them. No one can take you seriously when you have stuff in your teeth, no matter how good your personality is. To make matters worse, I saw Yung Oak and an old college friend...and I smiled the whole time. Sad.

nice enough?

This morning I went on a walk with my friend and we had a nice long talk about being nice. A few weeks ago, someone had the nerve to rip on Alex...to ME! I was completely shocked. Annoyed, hurt, and shocked. I just kept saying how cute and fun I thought he was, and she kept telling me he was annoying. I could not believe it. I really couldn't. So, it leads me to wonder where she learned that that was OK. First of all, to talk about him. Second of all, to do it to his mom.

Lizzy and Emily are having some problems with one of their friends at school. She has been their friend since kindergarten. She is really cute and fun...and really manipulative. Lately, she has been trying to get them to cheat. She wants Emily to help her write her book report. She wants to look at Lizzy's paper during class. She urges them to lie to their teacher and to me. I've HAD it. I really have. We have been having LOTS of conversations about her this week. About what is ok, and what isn't. About saying no until she stops asking. About kids who try to manipulate their friends. I talked to their teacher about it this morning. I think it will help. Emily and Lizzy are brave, and they have eachother, but peer pressure in 5th grade is ridiculous.

My friend and I talked about lots of other things we have observed in people around us and are wondering why kids aren't nicer. More honest. Harder working. Less judgemental. How do we teach them to be more kind? That's the answer...we TEACH them to be more kind. We teach them every opportunity we get. Every day. We have conversations with them about what happened at school. About what is happening in a program we are watching. About what they learned at church. I think a lot of parents let things slide. It's easier than making a big stink. I let things go sometimes, but not often, if I'm being honest. Yes, my kids are brats sometimes. Yes, they are disobedient. Yes, they are mean. I'll tell you what though, when I am there, when I notice, we stop and we talk about it. We need to make more of a stink. "That wasn't very nice to say." "It's not nice to correct people in front of others." Don't ever point out what makes someone different...ie. fat, warts, whatever. They already know they are different." I think all of these things can be said in a gentle, loving, safe way. We can help them try to feel what other people are feeling. We can, right?

Kids and teenagers get smart and sassy. I did. Does that mean it's ok? I really don't think it is. Things people say can hurt. Kids need to be more aware of that. They can HURT someone by what they say or don't say, what they do or don't do. They need to feel more accountability. It is not ok to be mean. It's not ok to ignore and leave people out. It's not ok to get our kicks and laughs at other people's expense. It just isn't.

There is no question I could be working at all of this a little more for myself. My kids need to see me be nice. They need to hear me be nice. And THEY need to be nice. Couldn't we all work together and create a kinder, gentler generation?

september...

This picture really has nothing to do with my post, but my mom just posted it on our family website and I love it. So much. This was taken on the front steps of Grandy and Grampy's beachhouse in Seaside Heights, NJ. What a wonderful place. I know now, that it was really quite junky, but it was heaven when we were little. Rainbow Rapids, a waterslide park, was just across the way. The beach was just a few blocks down. I would do anything to go back there. This is my mom (top right) with 6 of her girls + 1. Not sure who the gal is with the short hair. Caroline is top left (she is #3), Sally is just to the right of her, I am sitting in the front with Tracy, and Caroline and ? are holding the twins, Rachel and Laura. Isn't my mom beautiful? This beachhouse = happiness for me.

I thought I'd post a few things about life in the Schofield house as of September 19, 2011:

1. Margaret is still cute. She is fiesty though. I don't love that. Not even a tiny bit. Last night she hit Alex on the head then crossed her arms across her chest and refused to apologize. She is mean to him. She won't let him kiss her or hug her, and it makes me mad.

2. She knows how to get what she wants. She looks right at you, after you have said "no" for whatever reason, tips her head just a tiny bit and says, "Pleathe?" Her lisp is super cute. I wouldn't mind if she kept it for awhile.

3. She, as well as the other kids, wants to watch Wild Hearts Can't Be Broken every single day. Sometimes twice...or thrice. Remember that movie? It is fabulous except for the guy from 16 Candles who is a little Keanu-ish. I loved the movie when I was in college. My friends called it Wild Hearts Can't Be F-ed. They threw "F" into everything. Not the f-bomb, just the letter. Anyhow, I love the show and the music in it. I've gotten used to it playing in the background of my day.

4. Emily got 4 teeth pulled last week, while Molly got 2 fillings. Very soft teeth around here. Anyhow, they did great. Emily was perfect through the whole thing, but started vomiting as soon as they sat her up and let her walk around. So...I spent 15 minutes in the bathroom with her, rubbing her back and wiping her mouth since she was numb, while Molly sat completely still getting herself worked on. I love that my kids aren't bothered by the dentist. I got lucky. It sure does make things easier.

5. Alex is learning responsibility. He is the 1st counselor in the deacons quorum and forgets things...a lot. It bothers him that he does. So, we talk about how to keep it from happening again. He is irresponsible with school. Misplaces things, forgets assignments. But he WANTS to be better, so I think he will. He just needs to watch Elizabeth and Emily.

6. Molly loves kindergarten. She also still loves to cut paper and leave it all over the house, or on my pillow, disguised as "gifts." Then she leaves the scissors or kitchen shears where Margaret would love to grab them.

7. The kids are cute. I love being their mother. I'm overwhelmed though, and anxious...a lot. More than I should be. At home...where I SHOULDN'T be. I'm going to do something about that.

whisperings...

So, our ward had a garden this summer. A garden full of beets! Michelle and I had a bit of an obsession with them. Dave too. Roasted beets, sauteed beets, beet soup. A few weeks ago, we decided to walk to the garden together after the kids had left for school. It was a really warm and sunny morning, so we put Macy and Margaret in their strollers in the shade of a neighboring garage. I headed over with Molly and Gavin and we started to pick. Michelle hung back by the babies. I wondered why she wasn't joining us yet. This is why...

She had heard the garage door open. Our girls were all the way at the end of the driveway, over to the side, quite safe we thought. Anyhow, Michelle distinctly felt a warning that the driver coming out of the garage would not see the babies. No, she thought, they are out of the way. They're fine. Surely they will see as they reverse and proceed cautiously. Again...they're NOT going to see the babies. Michelle walked over quickly and moved them to the grass, right as the car sped out of the garage to the street. It seemed like the car was going 20 mph. The driver DIDN'T see the babies, or Michelle who was 2 feet from the driver's window until the car shifted from reverse to drive to head down the street. Our hearts were racing. Macy may have been far enough out of the way, but Margaret wouldn't have. I am so, so thankful that Michelle heard that whisper, that she took the time to respond to it. I'm also thankful that the Lord sent it.

13.1

I did it. Actually, WE did it. Tara and I. My 2nd half marathon is done and it was so freaking fabulous. 1:37:54. Woohoo! I had every intention of running the Provo River Half in August with Kami and Tara, but I hit my funk, in case you forgot, and doubted that I could do it at all, let alone as fast as I wanted. I was really sad. I should have signed up and run it anyhow. I still would have beat my old time. I decided I wanted another 1/2 to run sometime this fall. I sortof had my eye on the Halloween 1/2 in October.

Tara had other plans. I had heard of the Nebo Half. This was it's first year. She had a thought a few weeks ago that we just needed to do it together. That it would be the perfect race. We decided not to tell anyone so the pressure wouldn't freak me out and I could just enjoy it. I obviously told Dave, but kept it really quiet until the night before when I told a few other friends. I really think that helped. I never had to tell anyone my goals, I could just run as hard as I could.

I felt prepared for this race. We had a great 12 mile hilly run last week and I felt very confident. I didn't sleep very well the night before, and my plans of getting to bed my 8:30 were a total joke. Oh well. I got up at 4:05 and was out the door to get Tara by 4:30 to head down to Payson. We knew the course had a pretty huge elevation drop (3300 ft), so we knew it would be fast, but had no idea it would be so beautiful. I didn't take these pictures...I can't imagine carrying a camera, but at times really wished I had.

We took the bus from Payson High School all the way up to the Payson Lakes area. It was dark and cold, and the roads were windy and nauseating. Once we got to the staging area, there was music, fire pits, Honey Bucket's...all a girl could ask for. It was tough to stay warm for the next hour. The fires were smokey. Tara and I both had a Gatorade primer about 30 minutes before the start, then a Gu Roctane about 15 mintes later. I have only tried Roctane twice, but have really liked it. I don't really like to eat before I run, so the calories and caffeine are just the kick I need to run hard.

Mile 1 - 7:56, mile 2 - 7:23

There is always a little bit of chaos at the start of a race. This was no different. The gun went off, and so did I. Then I saw that a runner had fallen. People were helping her, so I kept going. Tara had gotten stuck. Anyhow, I looked around for her for a second, then she caught up with me and we were on our way. The first mile was spent talking about how sad we felt for the gal that fell. How devastating that must be. I heard she ran the whole thing though. In my mind, I was hoping to take the first mile a little slower anyhow, to get into a groove, so this worked out great.

Mile 3 - 7:19, mile 4 - 7:05

At this point, I felt so, so great. I knew we were flying and I just didn't care. It didn't feel difficult. We were just riding the hills. My legs felt fresh. The air was so crisp. I think I ran the 1st half of the race with a smile on my face.

Mile 5 - 7:07, mile 6 - 7:37

Still feeling great. There were a few girls ahead of us that we had our eyes on. They were running a really nice pace. It gave me something to watch. We stopped at the aid station between 5 and 6 for a quick sip of water and 1/2 of a Gu, then were off again. I was surprised to see that we still managed a 7:37 with our stop. I was so happy.

Mile 7 - 7:13, mile 8 - 7:17

I was still feeling really strong. Pretty invincible actually. We were able to catch up with some of the people we had been eyeing. I kept telling Tara how strong and fresh my legs felt. Our pace even reached 5:40 at one point. It really was the perfect race. I loved the confidence I was feeling.

Mile 9 - 7:29, mile 10 - 7:36

The course started to even out here. It felt flat, which actually felt uphill when you had been cruising for so long. There were lots of little rollers. They felt like mountains. We grabbed water and Gu somewhere in the 9th mile. I didn't feel like eating any, so we just held it until the next aid station. We seemed to be playing cat and mouse with a girl in a white t-shirt. We would pass her, then grab water and watch her go by, then work to pass her again. She was really quirky. She would run with her hands hanging down by her side. We got a good laugh out of her...and laughing is a great distraction when your legs aren't feeling so fresh any more.

Mile 11 - 8:20, mile 12 - 7:59

We stopped at the aid station for a quick drink between mile 10 and 11. Tara had some trouble with a sock so pulled off her shoe to fix it. At this point, she told me to keep going and that she would catch me. So, I went. Didn't really like it. I tried to push hard, but kept looking back for her all through the 12th mile. I really wanted/needed her beside me. I would hear her cheer from behind so that I wouldn't feel the urge to stop for her. The hills were rough. I was bummed that they seemed so hard, but then remembered that I had just run 11 miles on those legs of mine and they were doing the best they could.

Mile 13 - 7:21

At the mile 12 marker, I slowed down so she could catch me. I wanted to run this last mile hard and I wanted to run it together. I needed her support and extra boost of confidence. We pushed and we pushed. The mile seemed to take forever. I wanted to cry. I KNEW I could do it, yet felt like quitting 100 yards from the finish. The sun had risen over the mountains by this point. It felt like it was cooking me. It wasn't. It couldn't have been more than 60 degrees, but after running for an hour and 1/2 in the shade, it was hot. Our pace coming into the finish was a 6:18. You can tell by the look on my face in these pictures. I had nothing left.

There is the green shirt we had been trailing for most of the race. Boy, there are things I hate about my form in these pictures. But you know what? Everyone has something weird about their form. Who cares? I'm running and that's all that matters.

Dave drove down to see us finish and take some pictures. I love these. Tara is smiling and I look like I want to vomit. I was smiling inside...really, really big. Once we had reached 10 miles, I know I would reach my goal. Actually all 3 of them. I had hoped to beat 1:50, thought I could possibly do 1:45, and dreamed of breaking 1:40. 10 miles in, I did the math in my head and knew if we kept up our pace and didn't trip and fall, we would be below 1:40. I was elated. I had no idea I could run that fast, for that long.

WOOHOO!!!

Dang, I look old here. 38 years old. This picture makes me laugh. It was 2 seconds after crossing the finish. I wanted to puke, have a drink, scream. I did it! I had beat my other 1/2 marathon time by 19 minutes and it felt awesome.

I didn't even have to use a Honey Bucket the entire time. What a blessing. We like to use them as backdrops for photos though.

I'm really glad Tara encouraged me to run this with her. I'm glad we gave it everything we had. I realize this will be a tough time for me to beat with all the downhill, but I'll do it. I will. And I'll be back to run Nebo next summer for sure.

13.1 miles

1:37:54

average pace 7:30

I do it!

Margaret is quite a two year old lately. She is cute as can be and thank goodness for that. If she weren't, she would be in a world of hurt. I think she may have what is officially known as 5th Child Syndrome. Have you ever heard of it? She is lost in the shuffle, trying to see where she fits. Her older siblings are a lot older. She can tug at them, push, kick...it just doesn't have the same effect on 10 year olds as it does on children smaller than her...say in nursery at church.

I have heard more than once, that she is rough in there. She tries to take toys away from other kids, then shoves when she doesn't get it. It stresses me out quite a bit. I want NICE kids. Anyhow, she'll get there. Our family has a lot of work to do. I know she can be taught to be gentle and soft, it just takes work...and I'm not sure that we can find the time. KIDDING. For what it's worth, she apologizes as soon as she sees she's hurt you...or not. Sometimes she doesn't, but usually she does. With a really cute lisp.

She wants to do things herself. Things that she just isn't able to do. She'll scream, "I do it!"...10 times a day. She is hard core stubborn. I hear I was too, so it serves me right. If I ask her to come to me, she'll run away. If I ask her to sit down, she'll stand up. She's rarely obedient unless I fool her with a fake treat. I realize she's only 2, but I need to crack down. I have a tough time with the back-arched, body stiff as a board, tantrums we are getting around here. Not often, but still too much.

But then, on afternoons like today, she'll climb on my lap, touch my face with her pudgy hands, lay her head on my shoulder...and once again, I'm in love.

hold on...

Not sure if this is the appropriate place to share these thoughts, but I need to write them somewhere. Alex got a sweet letter from my Dad in the mail today. I've told you about my Dad and his beautiful words before. I don't think there is anyone who can write more beautifully than him. His council to Alex...

"How is Junior High? It is where teenagers go to school. So, I guess you are a teenager! Hang on! Sometimes teen years are like a boat ride down the Provo River in spring time - waves, white water - lots of opportunities to crash. Well, I know you won't - if you hold to the iron rod. It will keep you safe and dry."

I really, really love this. Especially since it is something that I've been thinking a lot about lately. I have challenged myself to read the Book of Mormon by the middle of October. I started a month and 1/2 ago. In my readings, I came across something. I KNOW I've read it many, many times, but this time I heard something different. I was reading from 1st Nephi, about Lehi's dream...the tree of life, the iron rod. It talks about "numberless concourses of people pressing forward, that they might obtain the path which led unto the tree by which I stood...And it came to pass that there arose a mist of darkness; yea, even an exceedingly great mist of darkness, insomuch that they who had commenced in the path did lose their way, that they wandered off and were lost."

It speaks of others who were able to pass through the darkness by pressing forward, continually holding onto the rod of iron. Here is what I learned from this little section of Lehi's dream. It is not enough to WANT to get to the tree. It is not enough to walk on the path that leads there. Darkness will come. Challenges. Temptations. Struggles. They WILL come, and if all we are doing is walking on the path that leads the right way, we will become confused and lost. Our only hope is the rod. Yes, the path is good. It leads to the tree, but it isn't sufficient. There is no protection there. Holding to the rod, the words of God, the scriptures, will provide us the safety we so desperately want for ourselves and our families. I feel like I am a good person, who tries to do what is right. I go to church. I serve others. I take care of my family. It isn't enough. My life, my mind, my heart...they need to be filled with good and righteousness. I need to be holding tighter.