Years ago, when Alex was 2, a dear friend of mine showed up at my house with a book...The Strong-willed Child. At the time, I wondered why. Alex was a breeze. I had a lot of control with him. I realize now, that she must have known what would be coming...years later. She must have known about my Molly.
Let me describe for you our last 2 trips to Walmart. 2 days in a row. 2 nightmares. Why did I go back the second time? I'm learning. She is cuter than a button within the confines of our house, but leave, and it's all up to her. Really. Day 1: finishing buying gifts for my sister and Dave's sister who we have this year for Christmas. First off, even after promising me in the parking lot that she will be good and sit in the shopping cart the WHOLE time, she does not. She climbs into the back, then stands the whole way. It terrifies me. Tons of kids do it, but MINE will be the one to fall when I stop the cart. The one to cause serious harm to herself. Let me just say...when a 2 year old does not want to sit, she WILL NOT sit. You can't make her, no matter how hard you try. YOU HAVE LOST ALL CONTROL. I do not like that feeling. Whew man, I really don't. She wanted everything she saw. She tried to grab it all. SO, I had to wheel our cart down the exact center of the aisle so she couldn't reach either side. She was furious, but I had control, right? I started placing gifts in the back with her, telling her she could hold them for me. It was great until she started opening them. Opened a Hotwheel car that I had bought for our nephew. So, now she was going to get a prize for being rotten? I picked a few more for him, then hid them under my purse. She was happy until she saw the others and decided she didn't want the one she had opened. Screaming. Sweating. Out of there.
Yesterday was worse. The minute we entered the store, she was hollering at me. I want that. I WANT THAT! NOW! It sounds a lot like Veruca Salt, doesn't it? She's 2 though. Uuugh. Once again, she stood the whole time. Screamed because I wouldn't buy more yogurt. Then we went down the cereal/fruit snack aisle. We picked a box, but I told her she couldn't have a pack until we paid for it. Whatever Mom. She tried incessantly to get in to the box. She would NOT give up. I turned to grab a box of cereal, and in that 4 seconds, she had opened the box, opened a pack and eaten 2. I took them away and put them back in the box. I knew there would be a fight. She screamed at me with everything she had in her. People stared. I squeezed her...really hard. I wanted to throw her, but the staring people would notice. She says...well I'm going to throw this cereal then. She takes the Applejacks and chucks them. I squeeze again. She screams again. HELP. If I can't throw them, I'll crush them. I'll stand on them until the boxes are flattened. Her mind is constantly wondering...what can I do next? I got all my produce, trying to pretend I couldn't hear her. Trust me, I could. I'm not going back with her. EVER. I will do all my shopping at 5:30 in the morning if I have to. I'm tired.
18 comments:
Woh. I've been there myself and I know just how you feel. It's a good thing they're so dang cute or some poor kid would end up in a dumpster. Awww. I guess some kids do. See? You're actually a good mom! Think of that next time the little sweetheart is chucking food across the aisles of Walmart.
Love this post. I feel your pain and laugh at it at the same time. Call me and we will talk about the doctors visit last night with Addi . Seriously...what the hell? We're good people! we dont deserve this. hang in there.
SO so so so cute/funny/annoyinh all at the same time. I have had days like that with Quinn. Not quite that bad, yet. hehe. We don't have the yelling or fighting yet, just crying and boy can my girl give me the look of death. Seriously, she almost growls at me with her eyes when I tell her "no" outside of the house. haha good times
Oh, Amy, you know I have a strong-willed child, so I feel your frustration! Ethan unbuckled himself and double-flipped out of the "car" at Maceys once - screaming all the way. I'm amazed those two played so well together the other day. I don't know how many times I've had to check Ethan's arms to make sure I didn't leave finger marks. I love knowing that I can confess my weaknesses to you and get understanding instead of judgment - such a great friend!
My kids are as strong willed as this little one. I am trying every day to understand and work with it rather than against it. Alexa is in the I want EVERYTHING... its harder since Christmas is here. Dunno... wish I had good advice. I think it helps when I let them pick something to look at first. They get a snack in the cart, but only if they are sitting down. Maybe you need a leash? My SIL swears by hers. I cant bring myself to do it.
Man, my Molly girl is quite the independent child, huh? Maybe you'll just have to drop her off at my house when you go shopping? You know I'd love it.. can't wait to see you today. Maybe around 4? Love you.
whoa--it wore me out to read that. I have never really seen that side of molly . . . hard to imagine. heehee
I have no advice . . .but I have been there done that with the screaming child at wal-mart every one looking at you like that. Call me any time you want to leave her so you can go shopping. Alone. Without it having to be some horrible hour of the day.
I think most parents have been there. Secretly, I kind of appreciate it when someone else's kid is throwing a fit ... it usually distracts Grace enough that she momentarily forgets about everything she wants to grab and just watches the other kid. So you probably helped someone else's Walmart trip go a little smoother. :)
I was talking about Layla and Kristin told me to go and read your blog...she said, "She has a two year old as well." So I went right to the computer and read...wow, I am not alone! I have been there more then I want to think about. Our little Layla is so similar. I need to read that book! They are so darn cute though, which makes it even harder!
Jennifer Price
I'm so glad you blogged. I check everyday. Been missing you a lot lately. Thanks for all your comments, makes me feel loved. I officially refuse to take Charlie to the grocery store ever again, too. Let's be a club. BTW, tore the brown bag today, probably beyond repair. I'll miss it. Looking for a good replacement.
That does not sound fun. Clara was a lot like this. I found that if I took a snack for her to eat she would do better. Usually something that took a long time to eat like lots of little cereals or raisins.
Oh Amy...I think the worst part is the other mothers staring. I try so hard to give a sympathetic smile to mom's and say..."don't worry..I have one of those too" just so the mommy knows I'm still on her side...even though everyone else in the store isn't.
I think the best thing you can do IF there is a next time...is pluck her out of the cart that instant...leave your cart with everything in it and walk out the door. She might just figure out that you WON and are serious that the behavior is not allowed. It would be a bummer because you would have to go back later...but it just might leave an impression with her...unless that is...she was just wanting to go home the whole time...hence the fits! Who knows...she is two and just pushing every limit and mommy's buttons! {I would even hand the opened hot wheel to an associate and tell them that I will be back to pay for that later.}
I agree...your other option...shop at 5:30am...or like me...I go at 9:00 pm sometimes just for some alone time, but I visit Target.
You know what's funny? Scott and I told Marley the other day we were changing her name to Veruca. :)
I am going through the same thing with Marley right now. She is so strong-willed. I remembered something this morning though that my mom and dad did when me and my sisters were young. We were acting up that day so they packed us up in the car and took us to Baskins Robbins for a treat ... if we were good. But they knew we wouldn't be, they wanted to prove a point. We got there, misbehaved and we left. From then on we would know they were serious, that if they said we would only get a treat if we were good ... they really meant it. I don't know if this helps you but it might help me today! :) love ya!
oh man, do i ever feel for you. i can't even begin to tell you the amount of times i have been sweating in the grocery store ready to lose it with my kids. you are a good mom, you kept your cool and molly made it out of the store alive!!
It's the redhead in her. Sorry, Amy, it's going to just get worse(since I'm redheaded I can say it)! I get so embarrassed when stuff like that happens. You want to hide because you know that EVERYONE is thinking, "Can't she control her kid?" Good luck. She's so cute!
It's the redhead in her. Sorry, Amy, it's going to just get worse(since I'm redheaded I can say it)! I get so embarrassed when stuff like that happens. You want to hide because you know that EVERYONE is thinking, "Can't she control her kid?" Good luck. She's so cute!
This made me cry and laugh at the same time. I know you either wanted to walk away and say to everyone "whose child is she" OR squeeze her arm so hard that it stopped all blood circulation. Miss you guys. Hope you had a great Thanksgiving.
That. Is. Hilarious. You can laugh about it now, right? I agree with the previous post about taking her immediately out of the store if she acts up. A good technique. It will only take one or two times before she gets the message. I always take lots of gum to keep E occupied (not that I want her to have it all; she chews each piece for 1.33 minutes before wanting a fresh stick...but hey, I figure 75 cents' worth of gum is a good investment for a little peace at the store). What distracts Molly?
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